


Have you ever been in love and overcome that first fear

by AmyJorumStitchery



Series: He's the kind of love that makes a whirl in your mind [33]
Category: Tim Curry - Fandom
Genre: Babyboy and Amy sitting in a tree, F/M, First Kiss, Idiots in Love, Realizing it's the real deal, True Love, True Love's Kiss, a lighter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-12 09:00:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29007939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmyJorumStitchery/pseuds/AmyJorumStitchery
Relationships: Tim Curry/Amy Willard
Series: He's the kind of love that makes a whirl in your mind [33]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1253372
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	Have you ever been in love and overcome that first fear

I woke up the next morning and something was definitely different - a good "different" this time. Not knowing what it was and desperately needing to savour it, I lay as still as I possibly could under my blanket as I let my thoughts wander free, not really aware of the smile on my face.

I had been in the same state of mind for so long that I had grown accustomed to it, and had stopped reflecting over it - it had become a state of normal I wasn't aware I shouldn't even have been in in the first place, but life had dragged me down so gradually and slowly I hadn't really noticed.  
It's crazy how you come accustomed to your life.

Getting up, I automatically put music on for a sense of company and had to stop in the middle of pouring my morning coffee. Had Steven's voice _always_ been this majestic and piercing? And had Joey's drums _always_ been this clean and comforting? 

I had been listening to Aerosmith for years, I knew all the lyrics backwards and forwards, I knew every single note of music as if I wrote them myself - how come I hadn't noticed until now?  
  
Steven's voice told me: _It's amazing with the blink of an eye, you finally see the light._

He was right and I smiled to myself.

_It's amazing when the moment arrives that you know you'll be alright._

"Yeah, I'm gonna be alright," I thought to myself.

Giving a bemused exhale I sat down by the kitchen table to drink my coffee when I spotted a lighter halfway under some papers and my heart started thumping. I remember straight away why I had it. It was his - Tim's, and yesterday he'd insisted for me to keep it when I was handing it back to him.  
I remember in detail what he had worn and how he smelled, how soft and big his hand was pressed to mine, and how warm he was, but most of all I remember how he had made me feel standing out in the lukewarm evening, and it was exactly the same feeling I felt now - giddy and elated.

I wasn't used to this - not at all, and the lightness in me was very unfamiliar and I didn't really know what to do with it.  
Sipping my coffee I fiddled with the lighter, needing to touch it since it was the only connection I had to him at this moment and I actually missed him. It was a nice feeling - an unusual and strange feeling and it took for me to drain about half my cup before I realized that's just what I had been searching for for so long - someone to make me feel the way I did right now, someone who could make me forget about life and how horrible it could be at times, someone to hold my hand and make me giddy and elated.

But why on earth would he go for someone like me? I was a 23-year-old bartender slash retailer with a fragile mind who drank too much. He was a 51-year-old famous actor who could pick and choose from the smorgasbord of women my mind had me to believe was lining up - I had nothing to offer him. 

We had 28 years apart, for god's sake! Why would _anything_ happen? I was fooling myself... But he had been so genuine and kind last night and it felt like a spark had been lit which I desperately wanted to preserve and nurture - understanding it would be good for me.  
How would I ever run into him again, though? And what are the chances he picked up on my implied little invite about working on Saturday? Probably slim to none and maybe it would be for the best if I just tried to forget about the whole thing?

Moving to stand I rinsed out my cup and as I absently started to wash up some dishes, I realized that I couldn't let this go. I didn't _want_ to. How could I ever deliberately suppress this feeling I had in me? And how could I ever forgive myself if I did?  
I wanted to be happy - I owed it to myself, and I had an inkling Tim could be my provider of happiness.

It was totally selfish, but I couldn't deny the way he made me feel about myself and I couldn't just let this slip by, and I silently prayed I would see him again. That he had taken the hint about me working on Saturday.

*

It was an uneventful, early Saturday evening. The calm before the storm, if you wish, and I was stacking up clean glasses on the shelves behind me, knowing I'd need them in just a few short hours. Tim had been on my mind pretty much constantly these last few days and I love that mental escape. I loved the feeling of being awake and alert and how life had taken such an awesome 180° turn - I was a novice on that path, but that was fine.

Tyler and I were talking about the guy he had been seeing for a few months and how he could never get him to spend the night. Tyler had suspected for a long time that he was in fact married and had a wife he went home to every night.

"A female-wife!" Tyler lamented to me, half-jokingly, half-seriously. "The fucker has a female wife and I just let him stomp all over my little heart." Pouring a customer a beer as he shook his head. "Here ya go, sir, Enjoy."

"Oh my god, Ty! How can you stand that? How can you let him treat you that way?"

He leaned in after the customer had disappeared with his drink, "The fucker is an animal in bed, Amy. Jesus fucking christ!" I gave an amused snort. "The cock on that man is to die for!" Waving a hand in the air.

"You're such a great guy, Ty and I hate that he lies to you."

"Yeah yeah, it is what it is." Swigging from his glass of coke. "God is punishing me for being so damn irresistible!"

"Yeah, _that's_ what it is." Rearranging some shot glasses under the counter.

I noticed the front door opening and it made me shoot up a little faster than one normally would. Hoping it would be Tim, all of me filled with anticipation. Tyler noticed and gave me a curious look.

"That's the third time tonight you've done that, Amy. What's up? You're expecting someone?"

His comment caught me off guard since I didn't think I was being _that_ obvious and I felt more than busted, so I tried to act cool about it. Shrugging as I wiped my hands on a kitchen towel.

"No, I was just startled, that's all, nothing's up..."

"Yeah, sure..."

I forced a smile every bit as much as I forced down the need to explode and tell him about the wonderful meeting I had two nights ago, but not knowing what any of this meant and where it would take me or if it even _would_ take me somewhere, I choose to be quiet and carry on with my work. It was hard, though. Tyler was one of the few real friends I had and I wanted to tell him why it felt like I had been wrapped in purple cotton since Thursday, but I couldn't.

* 

The one minute I didn't happen have Tim on my mind was when he actually stepped through the doors of the pub, and my inside felt as though being strapped to a rollercoaster when we laid eyes on each other. _Oh my god, he is here._

Putting his hand up to give a wave, I did the same while trying not let my face show too much, and he made his way towards the bar.

"Hello, Amy."

"Hi, Tim."

"I found my way over here."

"So I see. You've come to try out our domestic beer?" I quipped.

_Were my heartbeats visible to him? It felt like they were._

He chuckled and sat down on a stool. "No, thanks. I was just in the neighbourhood running some errands and I figured I'd pop my head in for some coffee." He gave a smile. "How have you been?"

"Just great," I said with a genuine smile as I turned around to fetch him a cup, standing on my tippy toes to be able to reach it off the shelf. "Work, as usual, you know."

He nodded his agreement.

"How have you been since last time?"

"Oh me? Just great," he said with a smile of his own, "work, as usual, you know."

I gave an amused exhale as I poured coffee into the cup, "Do you take milk or sugar?"

_My god he was sexy._

"A little bit of milk, please."

Kneeling down to the little fridge under the counter I extracted a carton of milk and poured a dab in his coffee.

"So what exciting errands have you been taking care of downtown?" I asked and leaned closer to him over the counter, pretending to wipe away some dirt off the wood conveniently close to his elbow. I just wanted to be as near to him as possible, all the time.

He had a sip and then put the cup down. "Well, to be honest, I just came from Wildcat Gin." My eyebrows shot up slightly. "I met a friend there and we had a few drinks..."

"So you went from a bar and came to a bar?" I quipped.

"You can say that," he kinda half shrugged before having a sip again. His eyes glinted. "I needed some coffee," he said innocently.

Tim stayed for about 30 minutes and the conversation between us was non stop, it was truly an amazing feeling when the words flowed so freely and were so upbeat and light.   
It was hard to remember the last time they had been this positive - I could speak with this man forever.  
We had talked continuously, making Tim completely forget the coffee in front of him and it had gotten lukewarm by the time he said he had to get going. More people had started showing up and the music had been turned up slightly, effectively pulling my concentration gradually away from Tim as other customers craved my attention to provide them with beer and hard liquor, so he said he'd leave and let me carry on with my work.

I felt a pang of sorrow in me, panic almost, not knowing when I would be able to see him again or if he even wanted to.

"It was nice to see you again, though," I said while pouring a young guy his beer.

"You too." He dug for his wallet in the inner pocket of his jacket, producing a 10 dollar bill. "For the coffee."

"But you hardly had any, Tim," I said with a smile, reaching for the cup to pour what was left in the sink. "You don't have to pay, it's on me."

One of my co-workers rang the bell behind the counter - the definitive indicator of a tip that just had been delivered, and then he threw it unceremoniously in the huge metal bucket underneath it and kept working.

"Absolutely not," Tim protested sweetly, "It's not your fault I forgot about it..." He paused while moving to stand, thinking about his choice of phrase, then he lowered his voice when he said, "well, maybe a little after all..."

I bit my lip with a stupid all-face grin and accepted the 10 dollar bill he slid over the counter, our fingers touching briefly and a charge of electricity surged through me by the impact.

"Put it in the bucket," he quipped with a wink. We were left staring at one another and my heartbeats rose to my ears. "Great coffee too. Now I finally know where to come for a decent cup in this town."

A customer called for my attention and I blinked as I was snapped out of my trance and threw her a quick glance before looking back at Tim again.

"I will see you again, Amy," Tim said with confidence, almost like he had made up his mind that he'd be back.

"Yeah, I hope so," I said as I rung him up.

He was out of there after giving me a wave and the music I heard in the background amplified, and like that, I was back in the room again.

***

I didn't see Tim again until Wednesday, but this time he was in the company of what looked like three of his friends. It was a little after eleven at night and I was pottering around behind the counter, tidying up and collecting glasses when I heard his unmistakable laughter even before I had laid eyes on him and my stomach somersaulted.   
He had such a delectable laugh and it thrilled me to the core.

Walking in as number three in line, I saw him look around and when his eyes finally landed on me he gave a huge smile and cocked his chin upwards in a silent greeting.   
I automatically put my hand up in the air to give a wave as I silently mouthed my greeting.  
The four men found a table straight away, just to the right of the bar, and sat down.  
I kept pottering around, trying to play it cool, and not let my eagerness shine through even though it felt like a had a ginormous billboard sign pointing at me, _with_ a booming foghorn, showcasing my secret affection for this man. I felt silly and giggly and not like myself at all - but I welcomed that feeling. I liked how he shifted my focus from pretty much everything but himself, and how little he had to do to have me smile from ear-to-ear.   
Filling up the shelf behind me I hoped he'd come up to me and order something soon. He had been here for almost two minutes and I missed him terribly.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him stand up and head towards the bar, involuntarily making my heart speed up the closer he got, and when he was within earshot he finally spoke.

"Hello again, Amy."

"Hey, Tim."

He perched himself on the barstool and laid his arms on the counter, clasping his hands.

"You've come for some coffee again?" I quipped and pushed a few stray strands of hair behind my right ear.

He gave a little chuckle. "No, not this time." Digging in his pocket. "This time I'm here for something stronger." Extracting his wallet he handed me a platinum Amex. "Two Corona Extra and Two Budweiser, please," he said while handing me his card.

"Coming right up."

Having worked at the bar for several years I knew the place inside and out, so it allowed me to stay where I was while fixing his order. Everything I needed was within an arm's reach. Something I was thankful for now since I didn't wanna be away from him for even a second. Everything was exciting in his presence. Everything seemed brand new.

"It's nice to see you again, Amy."

They were trivial words in any other context - a statement that gets tossed around, but spoken from Tim's mouth they were suddenly full of meaning since I knew it wasn't just something he said.

"It's nice to see you again too," I said sweetly and pushed the third out of the four bottles of beer towards him.

His hand briefly touched my fingers I had on the bottle and that little innocent contact of skin was more exciting than anything I had felt for a long time and an involuntary jolt of anticipation shoot from my head to my toes, and all I could think of was how much I wanted him to touch my body, to hold me close, to have his tongue dance over my nipples...  
Not wanting the feeling to end, I lingered for a few seconds extra before I pulled back to get the fourth and final bottle, topping two of them with a lime wedge without dropping my gaze. His aftershave playing with my senses and my world was so beautiful in that second.

"You're gonna be able to bring it all back to the table by yourself?" I teased with a grin as I waited for the receipt from the machine, angling it towards him in a silent question if he cared to have it, he shook his head while putting the wallet back in his inner pocket. "Or do you want a little tray?"

"See you around, Amy," he said with a cheeky smile as he tossed me a wink, effortlessly clumping the four bottles together to make his way back to his friends.

I took a steadying breath into my lungs and forced myself to keep working.

*

"Hey, man. You said you were headin' for a piss but here you are talkin' to pretty girls!"

Tim's friend approached him as Tim was sat on the barstool and dunked a palm in his back, effectively bringing both Tim and me out of the conversation we innocently had. Tim gave a smile and spun his stool around so that he was facing his friend.

"Yes. I was. I am..."

"Then go take a piss and tell the pretty little lady to bring us our stuff!"

"Absolutely, Gary, but do me a favour and go back to the table. I'll be right there."

"I'm thirsty, goddammit!"

Tim stood up and placed both hands on Gary's shoulder to turn him around, giving him a light push in the right direction.

"Don't be sittin' here talkin' all night, Tim."

Tim motioned for the remainder of his friends by the table to look after Gary, then he turned to me.

"I'm sorry," he said. "He's had quite a lot tonight."

"Don't worry, Tim. After three years in this place, I've experienced pretty much everything."

"But still, he was being very rude."

"He was very harmless in my eyes, don't worry." I reached for a glass and started filling it with coke. "Here, give this to him. I don't think he should drink any more tonight."

"How nice of you. He won't appreciate it now, but I know he will in the morning."

"Just tell him I splashed some Captain Morgan in it and he'll love it."

We both gave a smile and Tim reached for his wallet to pay for the coke.

"It's on the house," I winked before I turned my attention to another customer.

*

Tim came up to me about four hours later to tell me they were leaving and that made my heart sad, but this time I knew this wasn't the last of our encounters since things had already started to grow more serious, and we had already slipped into some sort of "mode" if you will. Each time Tim had ordered drinks from me tonight the line which had stayed so firmly in place before, had started to be pushed forwards, a tiny inch at a time and it resulted in us now being so comfortable with each other that we had started to touch, fingertips innocently brushing against one another, gently hooking on to one another.   
It was such a thrilling thing to have unfolding in front of my eyes and I could never have imagined I'd get to experience this feeling.

"Oh, well, have a good time then, Tim," I said trying not to sound too desperate for him to stay.

"I've had a really nice time tonight, even if we spent it very sporadically together," Tim smiled and put his hands on the bar, his right hand holding a pack of Marlboro.

"Yeah, me too." My heart was going wild in me. _Oh, Tim. Please touch me, I need you to touch me._ "Where are you off to now?"

"Home," he said, shooting me a knowing look which landed in my stomach, instantly making me warm. 

"I hope I get to see you again soon," I said as I innocently reached for his hand to brush my fingers on the back of his.

"Do you work tomorrow?"

"Yes, all week. But there's-" I didn't have time to finish my sentence as Tim cut me off.

"Can I have your number..?" he asked, suddenly appearing slightly nervous.

Pretending to be chill about it, I nodded as my mouth curved into an appreciative smile, "Of course," I said calmly, even though my inside was screaming and doing summersaults. Grabbing a napkin from the pile I jotted down my number across the Spicy Limit logo along with two little hearts - since I felt extra bold - and slid the square cocktail napkin over the counter.

Tim reached for it and our fingers touched again, and we both lingered for as long as possible, an energetic charge hanging in the air.

"Tim, the taxi is here," someone yelled and Tim looked to his left. 

"Yes, I'm coming." He threw a glance at the napkin, "Well, Amy, it seems as if my chariot awaits," he quipped, waving his hand towards the door. Folding up the napkin, he put it in the inner pocket of his jacket. "When do you get off work?" he asked.

"We close at three, so I'm probably gonna be home about half an hour after that."

"Can I call you then?"

My stomach fluttered madly and I gave a nod, biting my lower lip with a smile. My answer seemed to make him happy and he absently let his hands run along the lapels on his suit jacket before he held out his right one to shake mine, an amused twinkle in his eyes.

"Alright. Talk to you in a little while, Amy."

His manners mirrored mine as I had done the exact same thing at our first meeting outside Wildcat Gin six days ago, and him doing this was very much a little spoof directed at me.

"Yes. Absolutely."

This current scenario made me totally giggly and girly and I had to fight with myself to tamp it down a bit. He threw me one final sun-shiny smile before he was out of there, leaving me in a sea of warm, fluffy feelings which I loved to let engulf me. Reaching for a glass, the music that just had been white noise in the background tonight, grew louder and like on cue Bryan Adam's was spot on, _No place for the brokenhearted. I can't stop this thing we started, no way._

My life filled with pure happiness in that second, and I absently sang along and bobbed my head to the music as I filled the glass with beer to hand to a customer. You'd need a mop to wipe the smile off my face.

*

It was 3:20 and I was having one final smoke outside before I went to my apartment. Not that I was keeping track or anything, but I kinda was holding my breath for Tim's phonecall. He said he'd call me right about now and my insides were on pins and needles to talk to him again. Even though it wasn't more than three hours since we last spoke, I still missed him terribly and I just wanted to be near him all the time.

"God, I'm such a girl," my inner monologue told me.

Having one final drag, my phone started ringing, creating a fizzy sensation in my solar plexus that spread everywhere. Tim hadn't given me his number, so I couldn't really know for sure it was him calling, but who else could it be at this hour?  
Answering the phone with my name, just in case, I heard the distinct purr that only Tim can create and my heart was beating really hard.

"Hello, Amy. Am I calling at a bad time?"

"No, it's alright," I assured him while discarding the butt on the ground and reached for another one in my pack of Marlboro Lights, "I just got off work and I haven't gotten home yet." He hummed a little. "How are you?"

"Fabulous," he said, I stepped through the door about ten minutes ago and now I'm having a cigarette by the pool."

"You're not gonna go swimming are you?" I teased and he chuckled. Making the little hairs on the back of my neck stand up with lust. "'Cause I hear alcohol and swimming doesn't go very well together."

"Oh, no. Absolutely not," he promised. 

"Good."

"So what are you doing?"

"Not much, just having a smoke before I head upstairs." Taking a drag I then exhaled and studied the lighter in my palm, I gave a little smile. "I still have your lighter."

"Yes, I remember," he purred.

It wasn't a spectacular lighter by any means. It was a simple black one with one side slightly chafed, making the white colour behind it appear, but it was Tim's and I squeezed my hand around it and pressed it to my heart.

"You were a true lifesaver that night," I told him with a grin, "I always remember the cigarettes, you know, but somehow I tend to _not_ think about how I need fire to make them work..."

He gave a little laugh and it seemed like everything fell into place.

"I'm just glad I could make you enjoy life's little treasures, Amy."

"The demon tobacco," I said with a smile and exhaled smoke into the dark night.

"'the demon tobacco', you're absolutely right," he chuckled. "Just don't lose it," he said and inhaled, "it's my favourite one."

"Your favourite? But you gave it to me," I teased.

"I know, but it's my favourite one now since you've had it, and I might want it back."

I loved how simple everything flowed, and how every word seemed to expand and want to break free and create conversations about _everything_ between the sky and the earth, and how our seemingly meaningless discussion about a lighter still was thrilling.

"I'll see what I can do about the lighter, Tim," I quipped, biting back a grin he, of course, couldn't see, "but I promise I'm gonna take good care of it."

He gave a soft laugh.

"How was work tonight? I hope Gary didn't cause any problems or anything."

"Oh my god, no," I said and waved a hand in the air, "I'm used to so much worse, Tim."   
I had a drag on my cigarette. "I might be small, but I can take quite a lot of drunken nonsense."

"That's good to know," he purred "and I'm sure you can."

"Well, if working in a bar year in and year out, surrounded by drunk people doesn't make you an expert on human behaviour, I don't know what does."

"Of course."

"That's why I felt so secure with you from the first second we met, really," I confessed and bit my lip, hoping I wasn't exposing too much information too fast. "I could tell right away you are a good one and I didn't have to be afraid..."

"You never have to be afraid with me, Amy."

"I know, that's what feels so nice..."

A second of exciting silence, and I stubbed out my cigarette with my foot and leaned against the brick wall.

"Don't you get that 'training' as an actor too? Learning to size people up and read them?"

"Absolutely. I think I've always been a pretty good judge of character, you know, but since I started doing this for a living, I've really learned a lot about human behaviour..."

"Yeah..."

"...but I don't usually deal with drunken people when I work, really," he quipped.

"Might as well not, you know, imagine the scandal."

We laughed.

"You can relax, Tim, and let the drunken people to me."

"Ouch, sounds like a lot of heavy lifting for one person alone."

"No, not particularly." I shrugged one shoulder. "And if they are too much of a hassle, I just burn them with my lighter... _your_ lighter..."

He gave a heartfelt laugh, making my stomach flutter.

"Do you need a lot of winding down after a shift like the one tonight? Tim asked when he had composed himself a little.

"No, not so much. I usually take a shower and fall asleep in front of the tv. Very low-key."

"That sounds nice..."

"Yeah, it can be..."

Tim inhaled deeply.

"Well, I'm gonna let you go, Amy. _I_ on the other hand need some winding down after tonight."

"Aww, did you have a rough night?"

"Not so much physically," he admitted, "but mentally, yeah. I've been rather preoccupied... Much more than I have been for a very long time."

It was apparent that he was talking about us and our newly formed acquaintances, and knowing it was a positive situation for him made me exhilarated, and my chest opened up, allowing me to breathe so easily.

"I know what you mean," I said, "I've been thinking a lot too...tonight."

"Maybe we can talk again tomorrow?"

"Yes. I'd like that." _Oh my god, I'd love that_.

I could hear his smile through the line.

"Oh, good."

"Yeah..."

"So, Amy, it was nice to see you tonight and talk a little."

"Yeah, I think so too."

"Be safe on your way home."

"No worries, I live in the same building as Spicy Limit."

We chuckled together.

"Ok. Well, have a good night, and let's talk tomorrow."

"Looking forward to it, Tim."

"Me too," he purred, "good night."

"Good night."

"Bye."

"Bye..."

Hanging up, I had a huge grin plastered on my face as I fished up the key from my tote bag to open the metal gate. Letting it slam shut behind me, I opened the door as I hummed on a Bryan Adam's song, taking the elevator up to my floor. 

* 

It was a few days later and I had Hel over and we drank beers and listened to music when I got a text from Tim, telling me he was going into town in a few hours to meet up with some old friends and that they were having a couple of drinks in a bar not far from where I lived.   
He didn't really say it with his words, but if I read between the lines it was an invitation there and I definitely wanted to meet him. I just didn't know what to say to Hel since we had decided to stay in tonight and just chill, but on the other hand, I don't think she would be surprised if I, all of a sudden, suggested we'd go out and continue our evening at a club or a bar.

"Hey, Hel..?" I mumbled as I typed on my phone, doing the best I could to hide the fact that I was elated as fuck in the prospect of meeting Tim again.

"Yeah?"

"What do you say about continuing someplace else?"

Swigging from her bottle, she then gave an approving nod.

"Yeah, I'm down with that."

"Great," I said, not taking my focus of what I was doing, and when I was finished texting Tim, put the phone on the living room table and grabbed my half dunk beer. Trying to act casual.

*

Tim was currently at Hide & Seek with his friends, while Hel and I had been dragged into O Bar on the way _to_ Hide & Seek by some people she knew. Antsy to get to Tim, but not keen on divulging that, I held the disappointment and the stress I felt about everything taking so long in and "dutifully" ordered a beer which I finished way quicker than I normally would. Hel didn't seem to suspect anything but when she remarked on how fast I had sucked the beer down, I just shrugged and told her I was thirsty. Now, _that_ was something she often heard from me, and my secret wish to meet Tim was still intact.

With the phone not leaving my hand the entire time, I texted Tim and told him what had happened and his reply came pretty much instantly: he'd come over with his friends. Those words were enough to kickstart my heart and I sipped my second beer with some calm now.  
He wasn't far away from O Bar, and I saw him and his friends outside the huge glass windows not five minutes later. They were all smoking and laughing, and the mere sight of Tim was like a love-punch to my entire body and I welcomed the sensation of everything instantly becoming crystal clear and sparkly.

He stubbed out his cigarette and stepped through the door. The bouncer looking quite bewildered that Tim Curry just walked into his place of work.   
I saw them exchange some words and then the bouncer reached his hand out to shake Tim's, and the rest of Tim's friends followed him inside. I saw him look around, not quite so apparent as to crane his neck, but he was definitely looking, and when he noticed me I saw a slow, pleased smile spread across his face and he gave me a hello by cocking his chin upwards. Very subtly, but very deliberately and my stomach fluttered like crazy.

"I'll be right back, Hel. I just saw someone I know."

"Yes, hurry back. We're thinking of going to Memento a little later."

Giving a quick nod, I took my beer and headed over to Tim who was currently by the bar with one of his friends and they were just about to order. Not wanting to sky-write my connection to Tim - just yet - I pretended to bump into him and then act like it was no big deal by being a bit mundane in my behaviour.

"Oh, excuse me," Tim said even though _I_ was the one colliding with _him_. "I should really watch where I wave my arms at, hm?" he purred with a seductive smile.

"It's alright," I assured him, "no damage was done and I still have all of my beer in the glass."

"Lucky me," he said with a glimmer in his eyes. The bartender became available and Tim's attention was dragged from me for a few seconds as he ordered himself a drink. "Just so you know, I would be more than pleased to buy you a drink, miss, had I spilt yours," he told me with a wink after having a sip of his own. 

I gave a smile.

"Tim, it looks as if they've found a table," his friend said and nodded in the direction of where the others sat.

"Yes, I'll be right there, Sam." 

Sam took his drink and disappeared in the crowd. Tim and I were being moved around from our place as other customers approached the bar, and he cocked his head a little to the right for us to get out of their way.

"Hi, Tim. I'm so happy to see you again." I wanted to encircle him in a great hug and physically show him my appreciation for being there, but about 50 other people currently kept me from doing that. Also, I wasn't sure our status had reached that level of "intimacy" yet. 

"Me too, Amy." He set his drink down beside himself to have full attention on me. "How have you been?"

"Great," I said, and I meant it. I had truly been feeling great. Thanks to him. "I've been working pretty much constantly."

"At the bar?"

I nodded.

"I've missed that great coffee," he quipped, "been thinking about it ever since."

"I'm sure you have," I teased as I moved an inch closer.

Giving a chuckle, he contentedly let his teeth rake across his lower lip, his eyes hit me with full force as he brazenly held his gaze. It was making my throat dry and I had to drink in order not to start coughing.  
 _How in the hell did he do that? How in the hell could he make me feel this lightheaded?_ It was like he bore straight into my soul.  
What snapped me out of it was when he brushed his hand on my hand, not with any deep meaning, really, or with any kind of affection, more an offhand act. But he did linger for about two seconds longer than a standard graze. 

"I would love to spend more time chatting, Amy, but I'm afraid I have promised the guys to spend time with them tonight. It's not often we get together like this."

"Oh, of course, Tim," I assured him and waved my hand in the air, "it's not a problem, of course, you should be with the guys tonight."

"You're not going home any time soon, I hope?"

"Hadn't planned on it," I told him with feeling and the invitation hung in the air.

He gave me a little smile and picked up his drink.

"Then I'm sure we will see one another later, Amy."

"Yeah, I should hope so..."

Squeezing my fingers as he walked past me, causing my heart to rush once more.

*

An hour later and we were still in the same club - he with his friends and me with the people I tended to associate with while drinking. We still kept a very low-key approach to one another not to arouse any suspicion, a notion I knew we both thrived on.  
I could hear his heartfelt laugh sometimes over the general noise in a bar teeming with people on a Saturday night and every time I did, my heart skipped a beat and I got really excited. Everything about Tim excited me, and I wanted to do things with him that I'd never experienced before. 

I could tell Hel was a bit antsy to go, so we swigged the content of our bottles, then I searched for my pack of cigarettes just to check the status on them. Tim's lighter was wedged in the little plastic wrapping and I had to run my fingers on it, smiling as I did so. Then I felt a hand grab my arm. It was Hel.

"Hey, you ready to go?"

"Yeah, sure. I just got to..." I stopped talking and craned my neck to see if I could spot Tim, and to my delight, I saw him already looking at me from across the room. A wicked smile painting his lips and that made _me_ smile and subconsciously avert my gaze for a second or two before I dared to make eye contact again. "We're leaving," I silently mouthed to him as I cocked my head to the door, hoping he'd understand what I said. I saw him give a nod and then take a drink from his glass.

And before I was ready to be pulled away from his gaze, I was swept along by Hel and some of our drinking-buddies outside where we lingered a bit when we found some people we knew and wanted to talk to. Lighting a cigarette, I inhaled deeply and was made aware of how lulled my mind was now that it was intoxicated with booze and nicotine. It was a feeling I chased desperately under "normal" circumstances, but nothing was normal right now since a guy I happened to really like was sat just a few feet away from me, inside a loud and stuffy bar, and him showing up in my life was the greatest thing I could conceive of.

Standing outside in the early hour with people I knew made me aware of how the metaphoric weight that I usually carry around on my shoulders wasn't even there right now, and I wondered how long I had been free them. I don't think I was aware of the moment they actually disappeared - it must've happened so gradually over these last few days, and I had gotten lighter and lighter with each day, I guess.

I wasn't engaged in the conversation, and that was alright. I didn't feel the need to, and I stood quietly in the semi-ring that had been created with time and smoked, thinking that the colour on the tank top someone wore was very vivid and strong, and I secretly marvelled how bright it was. It was like I was able to see colour again - really _see_ them. _Had they always been this strong?_

I got lost in the lovely purple shading and how soft I imagined it felt against my palm when a voice I knew so well and loved to listen to, brought me out of my thinking.

"Hey, you smoke. Wanna light me up?"

I spun around - it was Tim, a cigarette hanging from the left corner of his mouth and he was digging in his pockets, presumably for a lighter - repeating the same sentence - the first sentence I had said to _him_ nine days ago. I gave an amused exhale with an ear-to-ear smile.

"I seem to have lost my lighter," Tim confessed while taking two steps closer to me.

"Yeah, I do. Hang on a second..." My voice was bubbly and easy and full of smiles and my hand reached down in my bag and extracted the lighter - _his_ lighter and I handed it to him.

"Ah, I recognise this," he said before he lit his cigarette and had a deep drag. Exhaling as he looked at me with such mischief, he didn't give it back but angled it a bit towards me and as I reached out my hand to grab it, he pulled his hand away.

"Hey!" I exclaimed in mock-offence with a grin on my face.

He coolly put it in the front pocket of his jeans with a shrug of one of his shoulders.

"I told you it was my favourite and I wanted it back.."

Giving a snortscoff, I showed my palm on his chest, trying not to give a snarky comeback.

"Sure, alright. But now you've taken away my only lighter."

"Oh no," he exclaimed in mock horror.

"How am I supposed to smoke for the rest of the night then, Tim?" I asked him in a not-so-serious tone.

He shrugged again and had a drag.

"Well, I'm thinking you'll just have to stay close tonight..."

Oh, man. He was impossible and his choice of words made a jolt of exhilaration explode in me and shoot straight into my head and my stomach. _He wanted me to stay close._

"Yeah, looks like I don't have much of a choice now..." I said, trying to act nonchalant all while my insides were in turmoil.

"That's exactly what I was hoping..." he purred.

I looked up at him with a crooked smile and had a drag on my cigarette.

"So, how's boys-night going? You're having a good time?"

"We definitely are!" Tim's eyes sparkled for a second as he thought about his boys and what they all had gone through over the last 30+ years. "We rarely get together nowadays, but when we do it's almost as we're picking up where we left off. And we fall right back into our roles."

"That's great, Tim. Good for you." We each had a drag. "So you're all knee-deep in reminiscences and nostalgia?" 

"Absolutely." He smiled. "Isn't that what you're supposed to be when you hang around with old-time friends?"

Having a final drag on my cigarette, I shrugged one shoulder before I stubbed it out on the ground with my foot.

"No, not when there's nothing to be nostalgic about..." My voice was serious and so were my eyes and in a split second Tim's own eyes reflected the meaning behind my words and he raised his eyebrows slightly with a quizzical expression.

"What do you mean?" he asked and took one step closer.

"Nothing." Waving a dismissive hand in the air. "I was just babbling..."

Tim's friends suddenly joined him outside and they were all talking excitedly among themselves. Everyone had a different opinion on where to go next and neither of them seemed to agree with the other. They talked about places like 'Memento' and 'Soiró'.   
One of them even wanted to get a bite to eat before continuing, but after minutes of debating, they concluded 'Whiskey 43' would be paid a visit. I thought that was a great idea. Whiskey 43 was just a stone's throw away from Memento, and that's where we were heading - eventually if we only would get moving any time soon.

"Will we run into each other later?" Tim asked, lighting another cigarette.

"We have to," I quipped with my old confidence back, "I have to smoke tonight, don't I?"

"Allow me." Opening the lid on his pack with his thumb, he pointed the pack at me to take one. Giving me his best smug look while lighting my cigarette.

"See you around, Tim."

"Oh, you can count on it," he said before he turned around and started walking up the street with his friends.

*

I had drunk tequila - two shots - and I _never_ have that! But it had helped to perpetuate the buzz, which I was thankful for. Standing with a few random people, I held my bottle of beer in a limp grip as I absently swayed to the music blaring from the sound system. I was slowly starting to tire of it all: the drunk people, the same meaningless exchange of dialogue between them, the phoney sentiments behind every word uttered and my own feeling of internal haste which often caused me to binge drink just to dull whatever I felt inside. Looking around I realized I had _nothing_ in common with any of these people, nor did I wish to. I was just tired and I secretly just wanted to go home and sleep.  
Going out had become a routine and something I did without conscious awareness, sort of like breathing and blinking. Autopilot. I wanted a change, I _needed_ one. I was only 23 years old, but sometimes I felt a hundred, like I had lived forever. My soul was tired and being so stuck in my rut I had no idea what I needed to do to break free of it.

Shaking all of this off me not to drown in my own misery, I raised the bottle and swigged from it when all of a sudden one of my favourite songs started playing in the speakers and I let out a shriek. Grabbing a random girl's arm, I tugged her along to the dance floor, screaming to her over the loud music that this song was awesome and that we _had_ to dance, she eagerly played ball and we started moving together on the crowded dancefloor.   
I sang along with Robert Plant, feeling an incredible sense of relief in me as I did. I loved how light a great song could make me feel.

"You've been cooling and baby I've been drooling. All the good times, baby, I've been misusing!"

I wasn't the one who usually danced when I was out. I preferred to stay in one place and drink and let people come to me - it was easier not having to move around so many strangers since I didn't trust any of them. It was enough for me to sit in my corner with my beer and talk to people on "my turf" so to speak, so my own willingness to dance amazed me, and I wanted to go with the flow and follow wherever this feeling led me and right now that was the dancefloor.

We danced for what felt like song after song, and I noticed how all the anxiety slowly left me while moving to both bad and great tunes. Music really _was_ great medicine.   
The random girl eventually disappeared, but I didn't care, I wanted to keep dancing. So I clumsily shook my ass to Bon Jovi and as I spun around I noticed Tim sitting by the bar with one of his friends. I don't think he knew I was there or else he would have tried to make contact. Seeing him again made my insides rush and fueled by a little too much alcohol and a cloud-free mind I made my way in his direction.

He leaned backwards with a genuine belly-laugh as his friend evidently had said something funny, his arm rested on the bar and his left hand held a glass of what looked like whiskey. As he straightened up he noticed me coming and made a little gesture with his arm - a silent invitation to be near and I wanted to seize it, and I soon found myself comfortingly surrounded by him. A strong right arm clad in a suit jacket which felt a bit rough when it came into contact with parts of my naked skin.

"Amy, I'm so happy to see you." I could tell he wasn't dead-sober, but neither was I, so who cares?

"Hey, Tim." Taking advantage of this newfound public display of intimacy, I leaned my body closer in a hug - I wanted to take it further than that, but I stopped myself in the last second. Still trying to keep up the facade of us not really knowing each other and that I was just a random girl who needed Tim Curry's attention. "How long have you been here for?" I asked. 

"Oh, not long. We literally just sat down." Looking at his wristwatch. Then he introduced me to his friend and we said a friendly "Hi" to each other. "How have you been?" Tim asked, his right hand slipping down to rest _just_ above my ass, eliciting goose-bumps all over me. We looked in each other's eyes and smiled - I could tell he wanted to kiss me by the way he behaved and how his gaze kept landing on my lips, and how obvious it was that his hand wanted to go lower, but out of respect stayed firmly in place on the small of my back, even though he took the liberty of slipping his hand in direct contact with my skin.

_Dear god, my own heartbeats were pounding so vigorously I could feel them in my ears._

"Just perfect," I answered with a grin and reached for his glass of whiskey and drained the content. A grimace forming on my face instantly. "What is that? 'Old Grand-Dad'?"

"The best of the cheapest whiskey," he winked.

"Jim Beam, Tim?" I gently scolded and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand.

He nodded with a chuckle.

"And I had you pegged as a Jack Daniels guy."

He kept chuckling.

"May I buy you one?"

"No, but thank you," I quipped and gave him a gentle elbow in his side. "I'm not much for whiskey to be honest." 

"So what can I get you?"

Realizing I already had too much under my belt I got to practise declining alcohol for once, so I shook my head.

"Thank you, but I've drunk too much already and I'm afraid I'm one beer away from doing something really embarrassing."

"How about some water then?"

How weird it was to have guy caring so much that he offered me water when I had told him I'd had too much alcohol already. His question wasn't something I heard very often when I was out, but it made my stomach flutter with affection for him and I nodded my yes. Tim gave me a light, reassuring squeeze with his right hand before turning around to the bartender.

"Excuse me, miss," he said, raising his lower arm off the counter, "can I have a bottle of water, please?" 

"Certainly." Turning to a little fridge behind her she fetched a bottle and slammed it down. "That'll be 7 dollars." 

Tim let go of me to extract his wallet from the inside pocket of his jacket and while he had it in his hand took the opportunity to ask his friend - Sam - if he wanted a refill.

"No, thanks mate. I was thinking I'd go back to my hotel," he said while he strained to leave his seat and stand up. "If I don't call Mary tonight she will kill me when I get home."   
Sam slapped a hand on Tim's arm, "Thanks for everything, Tim. This was great..."

"It sure was."

"I give you a call in the morning, yes?"

"Sure, mate. Have a good night."

We watched how Sam stagged off and I took his seat. I had a sip of my water and as I exhaled I sensed how at peace I was and how I was looking forward to going home. I was just debating with myself whether or not I would be going alone or if Tim would join me. I didn't know how appropriate it was of me to ask, or even if I _could_ ask. We had not known each other for very long.

I slipped my knees between Tim's wide sitting stance and enjoyed the feeling when he put his hand on my leg. We locked eyes and I gave a smile as I scooted even closer and leaned my hands on his thighs.

"What's that smile for? he asked and affectionately touched me. I couldn't help but giggle and cup his hand.

"Nothing," I said in a low tone, looking down on the floor for a second before my eyes met his again. "I'm just so amazed by you, Tim. You're so nice."

His hand carded through my hair once and then landed on the back of my neck only to trail to my shoulder.

"I like you," he purred. 

"I like you too."

"You do?" he asked with feigned surprise.

"Of course."

His hands landed on both my thighs where he gave a light squeeze, his eyes piercing mine as he confidently licked his lower lip before letting his teeth rake across it.

"Oh, wow," he said coolly, "imagine that."

It was like something between us had been highlighted and I was so relieved that it finally had. It made me light-headed and I couldn't stop giggle as Tim instantly got so very self-satisfied and silly - all very tongue in cheek. I moved to slap my palm on his chest and he grabbed my hand with both of his and cradled my hand. His eyes grew serious and I had to drop my gaze not to combust where I was sat and take a couple of sips of my water. We each leaned back in our seats and cleared out throats. None of us said anything for a few seconds, but I gave a smile and touched his knee again.

"How do you feel?" he asked.

"I'm...actually kinda tired," I confessed, "and I was thinking I would go home..."

We locked eyes I knew Tim was having the same debate in his head that I had, but trying not to dwell on it too much, he nodded and moved to stand.

"I'll walk you home..."

Putting his arm around my shoulders, I slid off my barstool and settled in his embrace. My tiny frame of only 4'11 tall was being shielded by him, and walking beside him this close made me realize _nothing_ could hurt me right now.  
Once we were out in the early morning, he let go of me and reached for my hand instead, a sweet, honest smile on his lips.

"I'm not really sure which way," he quipped quietly as he had a little look around, "so you'll have to lead us."

I gave an amused exhale and started walking in the direction of my apartment. It wasn't a long way and I knew we would be standing by the big metal gates within a few short minutes, and it scared me to death at the same time as it was the most calm I had ever felt. If Tim and I wanted to continue seeing each other sex would inevitably be a part of the relationship, but I had never gone that far and everything that was happening was new territory for me.

As easy he had made it for me to expose myself to him - spiritually and emotionally, I felt every bit as much like a bumbling mess and I sometimes stumbled on my words _and_ my actions around him. His hand was so warm and nice when it was close to mine and I wanted to stay like this forever. He had the sweetest little way of tenderly brushing his fingers on my skin as we walked and it kept my heartbeats at a steady level - fast, hard and only for him.  
We didn't say much on the short walk home - I think we both had come to the realization that we had reached another level in our relationship and it was only to take one route from here on out.

"So... This is it..." I said as we had reached my apartment.

"Mm, nice," he mumbled absently as he had a quick look upwards.

My heart was pounding insanely inside me, and I stepped closer with only one intention, really, and it was like he read my mind. With my hand securely placed on one of his arms, I made a little fist to grip the fabric on his suit jacket only to be able to pull him close, and as I tilted my head upwards, he dipped down simultaneously and crashed his lips on mine.   
The world blurred for a second or two and it was as if everything in me started accelerating and fire up, turning my every sense to "on" mode.  
I couldn't detect the slightest hesitation in the way he kissed me and his assertive side turned me on, making me transform into a human pile of the purest, most raging lust and I moaned in his mouth while our tongues wrestled.  
Pressing him even closer and wrapping my arms around his neck, I heard the fabric of our clothes rustle, creating such a sexy sound, inviting not only my body and heart, but my ears in this little session.

His hands slid down my body and I was easily and willingly engulfed by his huge frame. The kiss grew in intensity for a few steaming seconds before it tapered off, and we both inhaled deeply as we continued to make out. Our lips started pecking slow kisses on one another and we did so for many many seconds.   
His warm lips lingering and before he pulled away, he tenderly captured my lips, each in turn, and gave them a tender kiss. Then I felt him move away somewhat and I opened my eyes and what I saw made my solar plexus jolt with excitement - him, he, Tim - my Tim, so excruciatingly beautiful, gazing down at me with a mischievous little grin all over his face.

We remained close to one another as our thoughts spun around due to what just had happened, both of us giggling softly with a stupid smile. Tim let his hands wander over the back of my head, he was also the first one to break the silence.

"So..." Clearing his throat, "Sorry if I surprised you..."

"No, it's..."

"I've been wanting to do that all night..."

"Me too..." I confessed, looking up at him.

He gave a smile and moved to embrace me again, smelling my hair as his hands trailed up and down my back. He wanted the same things I did and he also wanted them to happen tonight, but even if I'd never been this close to it and didn't really know the protocol for how to proceed, I stopped myself before I uttered the words. It was as if he read my mind again, and he cleared his throat.

"Amy..?"

"Yes..?"

"Maybe we should wait a little with..." He looked down at me, "with the..."

It was a heated subject, even if we felt the way we did about each other, and I knew what he was referring to and what he suggested was that we'd wait before we jumped into bed together.

"I really like you, Amy," he said in a low tone and brushed the outsides of his fingers across my cheek, "but I don't want us to do this... too hastily..."

I nodded with a smile and caressed him.

"It's fine, Tim. I feel the same way..."

"You do?"

I nodded again.

"We have all the time in the world, really." Standing on my tippy toes to reach up to kiss his mouth, "and I don't want us to go too fast either..." 

He seemed relieved by my attitude and he kissed me passionately before embracing me.   
A few strands of my hair getting caught in his jacket as we pulled away, so I tucked them behind my ear, the other hand holding his.

"So maybe we can talk tomorrow?" I asked.

He gave a slow, confident nod.

"I'd like that."

We lingered for a bit, none of us wanted to say goodnight, really.

"Maybe I should go..." I reluctantly said after a moment, "I wanna go to sleep and have it be the next day so we can talk again."

He gave a little chuckle.

"Me too."

I leaned in for another couple of kisses and then unwillingly took a step backwards where I started digging in my bag.

"Here," I said and threw the half-drunk bottle of water to him, "it'll do you good in the morning."

"Thank you, Amy."

I bit my lip with a smile.

"You're gonna be safe by yourself, Tim?"

"Oh, don't worry about me. I'm gonna call a cab," he winked at me.

I put the key in to open the metal gate.

"Will you let me know when you get home, though?" I asked, "just so I know you've gotten home safe."

"Absolutely."

"Good night, Tim."

"Good night, Amy."

We separated unenthusiastically and I hadn't even gotten out the elevator on my floor when the phone rang - it was Tim, just to let me know he was in a cab and that he was heading home.

"So what are you doing?" he asked with a chuckle.

"I'm just opening my door to my apartment."

"Ah, I'm glad you got home safe," he quipped, making me giggle.

Kicking my shoes off I went straight into my room and laid down on the bed, and that's where I remained until the sun started to come up and graze the highest rooftops, talking to Tim.

_If this isn't the real deal, I don't know what is._


End file.
